So THIS is my deal...

Right, so for the past three years, I've been (unsuccessfully) attempting a BA in Fine Art.  I scraped through first year, failed second year, repeated it, then failed again.  Don't worry- this story's not a complete downer, because even though I technically failed- as in, that would be the official term used- I don't see it as a failure.  It was a course a embarked on for all the wrong reasons. 
a) Geographical convenience:  I had no money to move away from home, and this course was local.
b) I knew I could get on it:  I had previously been at the college for a Portfolio course, which I loved, and that made it easier to get accepted.
c) I thought art was anything you perceived it to be... and THAT was the cause of my downfall.


Watch out, because its about to get rant-y.


The thing about art is that it IS subjective, and what I considered to be beautiful pieces, the tutors did not.  And this is where it began to go wrong.  I started my first year thinking that I could take any project we were given, and twist it into something that suited my abilities.  I can draw, but it didn't seem to be enough.  It was as though they wanted a big, deep philosophy behind the work, and that just isn't me.  I like things to be fairly straightforward, which, fair enough, may not be the attitude to have- but when I see a piece of art (or what I consider to be art) I love to be blown away by the skill it's taken to complete such a piece!  Not what philosophy it represents.  

Above:  Just one example of what I consider to be mind-blowing skill, found on deviantART

Above: "Work No. 79, Some Blu-Tack kneaded, rolled into a ball, and depressed against a wall, 1993, Blu-Tack, Approximately 1 in / 2.5 cm diameter" by Martin Creed

Just one example of what the teachers find mind blowing, and what makes me want to punch someone in the throat.

Of course, I'd be lying if I said this was the only reason I failed.  I also have a real problem with writing essays.  I get in such a blind panic and can't write them.  Plus, there weren't any relevant topics I found interesting enough to write more than a page about.  I guess that's why I've started this blog- to improve, but on my own terms.  No pressure, no deadlines...  Is that a terrible idea?  Meh, I doubt many English teachers will be reading this anyhoo.  


Anyway, as I said before, I don't see all this as a failure, I see it as a lesson.  It just means I'm one step closer to discovering what I'm going to do with the rest of my life (although, i guess if you're a pessimist, it's a step further away, but I'm not and I don't need your negativity, guys!).  So while I'm working extra hours at my job, and saving up money to eventually leave and do something worthwhile, I'll be using my spare time to try a bit of everything I want to do, and I will be posting the results up on here.  If you're interested.


In the meantime, here is a link to my deviantART, just to show what I am capable of, and to prove i wasn't kicked out college for drawing stick men. 

www.gemmariemcc.deviantart.com

Have a good day, wherever you are and whatever you're doing!

Gem. :D